Feels So Good

Growing up was tough, as most of you know. Something I wouldn't pray on my worse enemy and I pray to God I never have to go through certain things again. My past has made me who I am today so I am grateful and thankful for God taking me through it. Growing up though there was something I longed for something I could never seem to find. When I was in 7th grade my parents told me to go find other parents. I have longed and searched for years that God would send a family to my life that would love and care for me the way I have always longed for.

Don't get me wrong I have met some fabulous lovely people through out my life that have helped me through and played 'mother roles' in my life so to speak. Without them I would have given up...but something just never really 'felt right' so to speak. I met Mike and married and sort of just forgot about the whole family thing as though I assumed it was 'too late'. Deep down though I still longed for that family to call my own. To know if I ever need a mom or dad to talk to I have someone to go to. Or a sister or brother I could go and just talk to whether them venting to me or vise versa.

Well as my close friends know, I have met a family. A family that I didn't really expect to be THE FAMILY. It started out with one and that one became one of my closest friend I have today. Now I/we call her aunt shoo shoo hehe that still makes me laugh. She introduced me to her sister and I knew then why God sent them to my life. I now have a family...my miracle family. I've been trying to accept this unconditional love stuff and accept the fact that they actually do love me and want me.

I told my best friend ever Jennifer Turnage, last night about them and she knows too how much they mean to me and how long I have waited to finally have a family to call my own. Last night I was talking to mom which most would probably know as Anna or sewnlove. I was so happy to talk to her as nana is in town and we've not had much time to talk after we had just started talking about every night even if just to say good night now I haven't talked to her in about 8 days. Near the end of our conversation mom said Jenn (my fantabulous remarkable 'little' (barely) sister) had gotten home about 30 minutes ago. I asked mom why she wasn't in bed by now and her response had me in tears.

She replied: "I needed some quality time with my daughter". I have never heard that in my entire life and I can't describe how good it felt to hear it. I enjoyed the remainder of my time with 'my mom' with tear filled eyes and peace in my heart. It feels so good to finally have a family to call my own. One to love me unconditionally, one where I can be myself and not be judged, where I can be edified and prayed over. I can not explain how blessed I am to be part of the Schnabel/Richter family. Thank you and Thank God for the most awesomeness blessing ever! I love yall so much can't wait to come home.